Ethereum is really bad – Please help me unstuck my transaction without becoming impoverished

I am an early adopter, bought my first Eth in 2014. Was very excited about the vision and path.

I am also excited it did shake up the world a bit and want to congratulate everyone involved.

However, I don't like the status quo. Buterin shilling with VIPs, Ice Age a joke at this point, and just a lot of goal post moving and appeasing to price, eg, by releasing Eth 2.0. Phase Idontknowwhatiisthisbullshit??

User experience has also not improved, quite the opposite. Currently I am facing 20 stuck transactions on Metamask with 10 different NONCES, what ever the hell that means.

Speeding up does not work, there seems to be a third option to increase the price, I mean, are you god damn kidding me?

I am a veteran and it is confusing as it can be, what did you do the last 3 years???Do I really have to spend 5000 Dollar to unstuck this garbage??

Sorry for the rant but it was due, and thanks for your help